10. Chicken Nugget Night
Welcome back to The Parenting Lab!
Today, I want to share something a little personal - a story pulled straight from the archives of my own parenting life. It’s a memory that resurfaced recently and reminded me of a truth I wish I had understood years ago: your children don’t need perfect. They just need you.
This is a story about exhaustion, survival mode, guilt, connection… and chicken nuggets. And I think it might give you permission to soften, breathe, and trust that the way you’re showing up right now really is enough.
A Hard Season, an Unexpected Nudge
Let’s rewind to 2013. My kids were 8 and 5, and my husband and I were in one of the most financially vulnerable seasons of our lives. To make ends meet, I had just launched an in-home preschool. I was creating curriculum from scratch, building a classroom with no budget and no experience, and working evenings on top of it all. My husband worked two jobs. We were stretched impossibly thin.
I had started teaching preschool so I could be home more, but instead I felt even more overwhelmed. I worried constantly that this new path was hurting my kids more than helping them.
And right when life felt barely manageable, I felt a very distinct push: Go back to school.
It made absolutely no sense. The timing was terrible. I was exhausted. We were struggling. But the feeling wouldn’t go away. So I researched it. And somehow - through a series of what can only be described as miracles - every door opened. Credits transferred. Aid came through. I was accepted for a brand-new semester… weeks away.
And suddenly, I was starting school again - on top of everything else.
The Saturday Night Struggle
My new rhythm looked like this:
Teach preschool during the day.
Work evenings four days a week.
Come home, care for the kids, get them to bed, grab a few minutes with my husband,
then start schoolwork around 10 or 11 p.m.
Work until 2 a.m.
Repeat.
All of my assignments were due on Saturdays at 11:59 p.m., so Saturdays became these frantic, guilt-filled, high-pressure days. I felt like the worst mom - tired, distracted, glued to my laptop, and spread so thin I barely recognized myself.
One Saturday, desperate for a solution, I announced something spontaneous:
“Tonight is Chicken Nugget Night!”
Dinosaur nuggets.
Tater tots.
A movie in the family room.
Dinner in front of the TV (scandalous).
And a sleepover on my bedroom floor.
My kids were thrilled.
They made their little blanket beds in my room. They got excited about the “special sauce” (which was literally ranch and mustard). We cozied up for the movie. They watched; I typed. Then I tucked them into their makeshift beds and worked until midnight.
And you know what?
They asked for Chicken Nugget Night again the next week.
And the next.
Before I knew it, Chicken Nugget Night became our Saturday tradition - for almost the entire four years I was in school.
It wasn’t glamorous.
It wasn’t perfectly present.
It wasn’t what I wanted motherhood to look like.
But it was what I had to offer.
What Kids Remember (It’s Not What You Think)
Fast-forward ten years.
No more Chicken Nugget Nights. The kids eventually got older and too cool and too busy for it. Life moved on.
But right before my son left for college, I asked if he remembered those nights.
His face lit up.
“Are you kidding? Chicken Nugget Night was the best! What was that special sauce you made? And the sleepovers in your room? Those were the best nights!”
I told him, “I always felt so bad because I was working. I wasn’t watching the movie with you. It felt so hard.”
And here’s the part that undid me:
He didn’t remember that I wasn’t watching the movie.
He didn’t remember me glued to my laptop.
He remembered that we were together.
That it was special.
That he felt safe and cozy and connected.
That’s it.
And in that moment, a decade of guilt cracked open and finally healed.
Your Kids Don’t Need Perfect. They Need You.
So here’s the lesson I want to pass on:
You might be in a season where you can’t show up the way you want to.
Maybe you’re working two jobs.
Maybe you’re in school.
Maybe you’re co-parenting.
Maybe you’re navigating trauma, grief, or illness.
Maybe you feel distracted, overwhelmed, or stretched thin.
Whatever your season looks like, your kids don’t need an ideal version of you.
They need the real one.
They will remember the moments you showed up, not the moments you felt you fell short.
They will remember how it felt.
They will remember the effort.
They will remember the warmth, the closeness, the small traditions that made them feel loved.
And those memories will heal you in ways you don’t expect.
Bringing Back the Nuggets
Now that my son has been away for over a year, he and my daughter are already planning everything they want to do when he comes home:
Gym sessions.
Music catch-up.
Food.
Movies.
And recently, unprompted, they said:
“We should bring back Chicken Nugget Night!”
And I’ll be honest - I got emotional.
Because that simple tradition, born out of survival mode, became something they treasure.
Not because it was perfect.
But because it was ours.
Your Challenge for This Week
Start a small tradition.
Something simple.
Something doable.
Something that fits your real life - not your ideal one.
It doesn’t have to be elaborate.
It doesn’t have to be weekly.
It doesn’t even have to involve chicken nuggets.
Just find a moment you can make special.
And if you already have a tradition like this - or your family had one growing up - I would love to hear about it. Leave a comment or send me a message with your story.
Your kids won’t remember the chaos.
They won’t remember the undone to-do lists.
They won’t remember the crumbs or the missed movie scenes.
They’ll remember you.
Showing up in the best way you could.
In the season you were in.
With the heart you had.
And that is more than enough.
♥ Your Parent Coach, Brittney